Dolly Parton – What's It All About?

Everything Was Big: Her Songbook, Her Hair, Her Heart and Her Personality – RIP Dolly Parton

I’ve now had many days to process this one, but I still can’t quite come to terms with a world that no longer has Dolly Parton in it. We all know that many of the music stars of our youth are now on borrowed time, but when it came to, “Who might be next?” I just didn’t think it would be Dolly. Perhaps it was because she never seemed to age (she was happy to admit the minute anything sagged or drooped, she had it nipped and tucked), but also because she was such a glittering force of nature, it was inconceivable that something mortal, like cancer, could take her away from us. But no more of that, suffice to say I don’t think anyone will ever have the world lit up in pink again when they pass. She truly was one of a kind.

As for this blog, I can’t believe I haven’t yet added a category for Dolly on my sidebar as I have written about her no less than four times. Once this one is published I’ll rectify that glaring omission.

I think we all already know Dolly’s story, and if anyone didn’t they certainly will now after the news coverage her death has generated. Ironically I had just finished re-watching her documentary Here I Am on the BBC iPlayer a few days before she passed. I had the telly to myself for once and perhaps because she had recently issued a message to fans about how she’d had heath issues but was now healin’, it jumped out at me. When the news broke on social media about her death I assumed it was a fake story, used as clickbait, but once I switched on the news at 10pm it became very real.

Dolly in the 1970s and Dolly in the 2020s

What I’ve noticed from the news coverage is how much snobbery and rudeness she had to put up with in the early years of her career. The American broadcaster Barbara Walters, when interviewing her, told her she didn’t have to look like that. It’s a wonder Dolly didn’t sock her one. She was a Nashville country music star and if I’m not mistaken that was very much the look of choice for such stars back then, albeit Dolly possibly took it to extreme lengths with the big ’70s wigs. Dolly came from exceptionally humble beginnings and now was her chance to look glamorous, something she had always aspired to. If people like Barbara associated the look with being a dumb blonde, Dolly soon put them right. As she said at the time, she definitely wasn’t dumb and she also wasn’t blonde. In recent decades, although Dolly always poked fun at her appearance, I think she looked just right for the industry she was in – the make-up was a bit more subtle, the wigs a bit less flamboyant and the clothes less showy (although they still had their fair share of rhinestones). I can’t believe we’ll never see her on a chat show sofa again.

It’s hard to sum up the many talents and achievements of Dolly Parton so I’m not going to try. Instead I’m going to leave it to this lovely lady, Pink, who gave a beautiful speech when she was inducted into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame in 2022. Pink also performed Jolene with her, along with many other stars from the world of music (and Simon Le Bon). Dolly at this point was aged 76.

Jolene by Dolly Parton:

Although Dolly enjoyed a remarkable Billboard Chart career spanning almost five decades, she didn’t ever reach the No. 1 spot on either the Official UK Singles Chart or Official UK Albums Chart. What were we thinking? She came closest with the studio album Blue Smoke which was released around the time of her celebrated 2014 Glastonbury appearance. The UK version also included a “Best Of Dolly Parton” bonus disc which probably was the draw. It made the No. 2 spot on the Album Chart. Among her most enduring songs, Jolene was the only one to reach the Top 10 although that may change as both it and 9 To 5 have re-entered the Singles Chart as of yesterday.

Talking of 9 To 5, it came from the 1980 film of the same name and how bizarre that my last post around here was about a bunch of blonde, high-heeled secretaries who turned out to be a lot smarter than their male counterparts gave them credit for. That personal story was from the mid-1980s so maybe Dolly’s character in the film, Doralee, had given us the confidence to take on the men at their own game. To think I shared that a day before the news broke that she had died. Did I have a premonition?

But before I end there will have to be some more music. Over the last few days the songs most associated with her have been shared widely, but there have also been a few I wasn’t aware of before, that have made me smile. Her first single to reach the No. 1 spot on the Billboard Country Chart was Joshua, released in 1970. The song is about an adventurous young girl who dares to visit the little rundown shack of a rural recluse, who has a reputation for being mean and hostile. As it turns out she finds that he is quite the opposite and ends up living in his shack with him. A fun story song written by Dolly.

The next song, Little Sparrow, was the title track from one of the three bluegrass albums she recorded at the turn of the millennium. Dolly had continued to reinvent herself over the years and it made total sense for her to return to the kind of music that was very much part of her upbringing in the Great Smokey Mountains of East Tennessee. It’s a gentle beauty.

So, we are now living PD – post Dolly. I still can’t quite get my head round it. She is leaving behind so much however. All those songs, the films, her theme park, her Imagination Library and the Dolly Foundation. Managed properly, her humanitarian work will continue for decades to come. Her husband of 60 years died only last year and despite never appearing with her at public events, they sound as if they were a very close couple. Tough to get over something like that and keep your health intact.

Until next time, a fitting picture from Lucy Claire Illustration. Dolly, you will be sorely missed.

Joshua Lyrics
(Song by Dolly Parton)

Well a good ways down the railroad track
There was this little old rundown shack
And in it lived a man I’d never seen
Folks said he was a mean and a vicious man
And you better not set foot on his land
I didn’t think nobody could be that mean

So I took me out walking down the railroad track
I was a-gonna go down to that little old shack
And just find out if all them things I’d heard was true
There was a big black dog laying out in the yard
And it growled at me and I swallowed hard
And I heard somebody say well who are you

Oh and there he stood in the door of that shack
His beard and his hair was long and black
And he was the biggest man I’d ever seen
When he spoke his voice was low and deep
But he just didn’t frighten me
‘Cause somehow I just knew he wasn’t mean

He said what you doing snooping ’round my place
And I saw a smile come across his face
So I smiled back and I told him who I was
He said come on in and pull you up a chair
You might as well since you already here
And he said you can call me Joshua

Joshua Joshua
Whatcha doing living here all alone
Joshua Joshua
Ain’t you got nobody to call your own
No no no no

We talked ’til the sun was clean out of sight
And we still talking when it come daylight
And there was just so much we had to say hey
I’d spent my life in an orphan’s home
And just like him I was all alone
So I said yeah when he asked if I’d stay

Oh we grew closer as time went on
And that little old shack it was a happy home
And we just couldn’t help but fall in love
That big black dog and that little old shack
Sitting down by the railroad track
It’s plenty good enough for me and Joshua

Joshua Joshua
Why you’re just what I’ve been looking for
Joshua Joshua
You ain’t gonna be lonesome anymore
No no

Yodel-a-he-ho

Me and Joshua
Me and Joshua
Me and Joshua yeah yeah
Me and Joshua

A Big Week In The News, Dolly Parton and “Jolene”

Well, what a week. I had intended to write another post that followed on from last time, but after two fairly routine vaccinations on Monday, I spent the rest of the week in bed with flu-like symptoms. It seems I was one of the unlucky ones who got quite bad side-effects, but on the upside, I should avoid Shingles, Pneumonia, Sepsis and Meningitis in the years to come. I was in two minds about having them as we’ve become human pin-cushions of late but then I thought of all the people of my generation who would still be around had they been offered the childhood vaccines now freely available. Also, a few days of feeling a bit shitty is still far better than getting the diseases listed above, so I went for it.

Not much to do when you have a duvet pulled up to your chin but I did manage to listen to the radio and scroll on my phone. In fact I did manage to do an awful lot of scrolling and it turned out to be quite a big week for news stories on social media. First of all the World Economic Forum took place in Davos where world leaders from government, business and academia met to discuss global issues and set priorities. Even David Beckham turned up to address issues with social media, which was quite ironic this week of all weeks.

The beautiful Davos in Switzerland

The not so beautiful Davros (impossible not to think of him when you hear the word Davos)

So what was discussed at Davos? I’m afraid the detail eluded me what with having a fever an’ all but it seems there was one very impressive speech from a world leader we know very well over here because of his time at the Bank of England. It will be remembered for a long time. There was another speech that will also be remembered for a long time, but perhaps for all the wrong reasons. Earlier in the week some of the posts on social media made me chuckle, but as the days have gone by I’m starting to think it’s all a bit sad. Having witnessed my own mum deteriorate mentally from the age of 80, I can see the signs. It was another three years until she was officially diagnosed by which time things had really got quite bad. I hope the administration in charge have the levers needed to address such a serious issue otherwise we really are in for a tough time.

A country whose name is apparently interchangeable!

A much-loved character from our childhood who was also obsessed by “windmills”, but he needed them to grind corn, not generate clean energy

Whatever happens, there now seems to have been a line crossed in the sand and for the male and female leaders of European countries, it’s time to…

In other news, there has been a very public falling out between the Beckhams and their eldest son. Most people will not be remotely interested in this but it even made it to the national news, so just shows the level of interest in their lives. Again, the first posts on social media made me chuckle, but for VB, former Spice Girl, this week has been excruciatingly embarrassing, and it’s sad that it’s come to this. A not very-talented singer and a good footballer have managed to amass a fortune through hard work and self-promotion, but, they didn’t ever consider that their children might not have wanted to be part of the copyrighted “brand”, especially as adults. Also, as the old saying goes, “A son is a son till he takes him a wife, but a daughter is a daughter all of her life”. I hope they can work things out behind the scenes but I fear worse is yet to come.

There was no actual footage from the wedding held for Beckham Jnr and his new bride, but the former Spice Girl has been accused of humiliating her son by doing a bit of this with him…

From all accounts it wasn’t that bad but VB would have been wise to remember that it was the bride’s day and only she should be centre stage. But what do I know? I do remember that not long after the film Dirty Dancing came out this song became a hit all over Europe and many of us tried doing the Lambada for the first time. Like most South American dances it’s a bit raunchy and not something we were used to in the Scottish Highlands, but maybe at weddings of the rich and famous it’s de rigueur.

Did you watch it? The latest series of The Traitors came to a conclusion on Friday and again, such was the furore, it featured on the national news. I for one just don’t get it but I seem to be in the minority so ended up watching the whole series (for research purposes). Personally I think of it as reality tv for middle-class people. It’s touted as “a game” where you have to be really clever to oust the traitors from the castle. To be fair, you do have to be a goodish actor if you’re chosen to be a traitor, but other than that it’s just a lot of people sitting around asking each other who they’re going to vote for, and lying a lot. Anyway, it got massive viewing figures, and the area it takes place in is just north of us so good publicity for The Highlands. The castle is at Ardross and I discovered this week it used to be owned by Mr Perrins of the famous Lea and Perrins brand. Look what a dash of Worcestershire Sauce could buy you in those days.

The beautiful Ardross Castle just north of the Cromarty Firth

This year’s finalists with the diminutive Claudia (who comes to our town for her spray tans!)

I didn’t mention who won the show in case anyone hasn’t watched it yet but no worries about spoilers with this next story, again on national news. It was Dolly Parton’s 80th birthday last week and she is still as busy as ever. I watched two programmes last night on BBC2 about her and it’s impossible not to smile when doing so. She is so upbeat and positive the whole time, exuding that wholesome Southern Charm. It seems she has been like that since childhood and it’s hard to believe she is not like that all the time but even Dolly must have her dark days, especially after her husband Carl died last year. She hides them well though and no-one ever sees her without her signature wigs, make-up and outfits. Even during filming, she never emerges from her dressing room or trailer without being fully Dollified. It’s just who she is.

Hello Dolly!

To finish off this longish post (sorry), here is a clip from 12 years ago when she appeared in the Legends slot at Glastonbury. I don’t know what Dolly’s undergarments are like, or if it’s all cosmetically enhanced, but she certainly has a perky bottom for someone of her years. This song, Jolene, was unbelievably the only one that remotely bothered the UK Singles Chart, reaching the No. 7 spot in 1976. Dolly has written over 3000 songs during her lifetime and apparently wrote both Jolene and I Will Always Love You during the same song writing session in 1973. Not a bad return on the time spent.

Jolene by Dolly Parton:

I think I’ve told this story before, but even to this day Mr WIAA winces when he hears the song Jolene. It came out at just the wrong time for him, before he’d had work done to remedy his slightly discoloured teeth, which had come about because of the tablets his mum had taken for morning sickness ahead of his birth. Oh yes, kids can be cruel, and because his teeth had a “greenish” hue, his classmates’ playground taunt was Joe Green, Joe Green, Joe Green, Joe Green… , sung along to the melody of Dolly’s famous hit. Needless to say, his schooldays weren’t the best years of his life but it just goes to show, sometimes a little bit of “work” is needed to make life as a teen just that little bit more tolerable.

Until next time…

Jolene Lyrics
(Song by Dolly Parton)

Jolene, Jolene, Jolene, Jolene
I’m begging of you please don’t take my man
Jolene, Jolene, Jolene, Jolene
Please don’t take him just because you can

Your beauty is beyond compare
With flaming locks of auburn hair
With ivory skin and eyes of emerald green

Your smile is like a breath of spring
Your voice is soft like summer rain
And I cannot compete with you, Jolene

He talks about you in his sleep
There’s nothing I can do to keep
From crying when he calls your name, Jolene

And I can easily understand
How you could easily take my man
But you don’t know what he means to me, Jolene

Jolene, Jolene, Jolene, Jolene
I’m begging of you please don’t take my man
Jolene, Jolene, Jolene, Jolene
Please don’t take him just because you can

You could have your choice of men
But I could never love again
He’s the only one for me, Jolene

I had to have this talk with you
My happiness depends on you
And whatever you decide to do, Jolene

Jolene, Jolene, Jolene, Jolene
I’m begging of you please don’t take my man
Jolene, Jolene, Jolene, Jolene
Please don’t take him even though you can

Jolene, Jolene

Postscript

For those followers who are happy for me to update them on any change at the top of the UK Singles Chart, I found out at 6pm on Friday that this song is the new No. 1 – Raindance by Dave (ft. Tems)

A Return to Live Theatre, Dolly Parton and the Legacy of ‘9 to 5’

Last time I wrote a bit of a frivolous post about people in the music business with very ‘big’ hair, inspired by the fact my own locks are currently proving troublesome (damp winter weather I think). It didn’t take long for me to get to Dolly Parton, as although in today’s world her look could almost be seen as understated, back in the 1970s her blousy, blonde wigs did raise a few eyebrows.

Dolly then and Dolly now

I was probably also drawn to Dolly because last week I had my first time back in our local theatre since before the pandemic. If you live in the far north of Scotland, the opportunities to see a West End show are limited indeed, so if a production comes to us, it feels only right we should support it.

My friend and I had bought tickets for Dolly’s stage musical 9 to 5 nearly two years ago, but after having been postponed twice, this time the show actually went ahead. Sadly the friend I should have been going with has not been well for some time, another victim not of the virus, but of one of the many side-effects of the pandemic itself. I wish her well and hope she is back to her old self soon, but in the meantime she very magnanimously said I could give her ticket to another. In the end it wasn’t easy, as some of us are still nervous about attending mass gatherings and no-one relished the prospect of wearing a mask throughout the show, but quite appropriately an old colleague from my days of working in offices said she’d love to come.

I went to see the film 9 to 5 when it first came out back in 1980. It was the first time Dolly had appeared on the big screen and just as with everything else she turns her hand to, she rose to the challenge beautifully, and ended up winning several awards, both for her acting and for the title song. The film was the brainchild of fellow 9 to 5 actor Jane Fonda, and she wanted it to be a comedy rather than a preachy, feminist drama, in order to get the message across more subtly. If you’ve never seen it, the basic premise is that three very capable women live out their fantasies of getting even with, and overthrowing, the company’s ‘autocratic, sexist, egotistical, lying, hypocritical bigot’ boss (the full gamut). They show you can run an office without a boss, but you can’t run an office without the secretaries.

9 to 5 by Dolly Parton:

To be honest I think I just took it at comedic face value first time around and I hadn’t yet stepped foot in a working office to know how things were anyway. Watching the stage show last week, in 2021, I was blown away by how much things have changed over the decades. Just possibly, the empowerment given to female office workers back in 1980 via the film, kickstarted the revolution that led to equal pay for equal work, flexible working, job-share schemes and so on. I know it was well underway by the time I joined the workforce, and by the time I had DD, the opportunity to work part-time or flexibly was firmly in place.

It’s not lost on me that since the pandemic, most people now seem to work from home, and a return to the 9 to 5-style office will probably never happen again, but I really appreciate that I entered (and left) the workplace at probably just the right time. Coincidentally, C over at Sun Dried Sparrows recently shared some job adverts from 1975 which were a real eye-opener. As I say, we’ve come a long way.

An unexpected surprise for me at last week’s show was that Dolly herself appeared on stage, albeit via a big screen. She wrote all the songs for the musical but is also the narrator. In her inimitable style, she gives us many ‘Dollyisms’ and also sings 9 to 5. It was a fun way to break myself back into theatre-going. If you listen carefully to the song’s intro, the clacking typewriter rhythm was devised by running her acrylic fingernails back and forth against one another.

So, ‘What’s It All About?’ – I’m not sure if this is a temporary blip or what, but when I returned to blogging this time last week I was a bit down and admitted to not feeling myself. Turns out she doesn’t even have to bottle it, all you have to do is immerse yourself in Dolly World (as opposed to Dollywood) for 48 hours and your spirits are raised no end. The feedback to my first Dolly post was very positive which shows just how much she is loved and admired. She seems to be a genuinely ‘good’ person who is now putting all her energies into making life better for others, whether it be through scholarships, her Imagination Library, creating local job opportunities, or simply through her music.

There are many, many famous quotes from her out there but I think most of us know them already, so to finish off I’m going to share the address she delivered to students at the University of Tennessee when she received her honorary degree. I think she won over a great many of the sceptical academics that day, and quite rightly so (we’ll ignore Prof Grumpy to her right) – She may be blonde but Dolly is most definitely not dumb. If you scroll through to 3:55 you will get to the point where she passes on some of the wisdom she has used to great effect in her own journey through life. I really hope the graduating students took heed, as they have one helluva fairy godmother in Dolly.

Until next time…

9 to 5 Lyrics
(Song by Dolly Parton)

Tumble out of bed
And stumble to the kitchen
Pour myself a cup of ambition
And yawn and stretch and try to come to life

Jump in the shower
And the blood starts pumpin’
Out on the streets, the traffic starts jumpin’
For folks like me on the job from 9 to 5

Workin’ 9 to 5
What a way to make a livin’
Barely gettin’ by
It’s all takin’ and no givin’

They just use your mind
And they never give you credit
It’s enough to drive you
Crazy if you let it

9 to 5
For service and devotion
You would think that I
Would deserve a fat promotion

Want to move ahead
But the boss won’t seem to let me
I swear sometimes that man is
Out to get me, hmmm

They let you dream
Just a watch ’em shatter
You’re just a step on the boss man’s ladder
But you got dreams he’ll never take away

In the same boat with a lot of your friends
Waitin’ for the day your ship’ll come in
And the tide’s gonna turn
And it’s all gonna roll you away

Workin’ 9 to 5
What a way to make livin’
Barely gettin’ by
It’s all takin’ and no givin’

They just use your mind
And you never get the credit
It’s enough to drive you
Crazy if you let it

9 to 5
Yeah, they got you were they want you
There’s a better life
And you think about it, don’t you?

It’s a rich man’s game
No matter what they call it
And you spend your life
Putting money in his wallet

9 to 5
Oh, what a way to make a livin’
Barely gettin’ by
It’s all takin’ and no givin’

They just use your mind
And they never give you credit
It’s enough to drive you
Crazy if you let it

Big Hair, Honky Tonk Angels and ‘Silver Threads & Golden Needles’

Really enjoyed my foray back into blogging earlier on this week, but I’m conscious of the fact it’s been a fair while since I posted anything jolly or upbeat around here. Someone who never fails to bring a bit of sunshine and positivity into the world is the lady shown below, and by a quirk of fate, she came into my life twice this week.

Dolly Parton with her signature ‘big hair’ in the 1970s

I don’t think this is something my male readership will understand, but my female readership definitely will. When your hair is proving troublesome and you can’t do a thing with it, your confidence takes a bit of a hit, and you feel a bit blah. Mr WIAA now has very little hair left on the top of his head at all, but a short crop is perfectly normal for a man of his age and I think it suits him. Unbeknownst to me until recently, a woman’s hair changes texture as they age – It can go grey and coarse, or become fine and baby soft. I seem to have fallen into the latter camp and it’s driving me mad. At times I just want to shave it all off and go down the Dolly route, and have a big blousy wig cantilevered onto the top of my head – It didn’t take long to find a fair few pictures of her many looks from over the years.

The picture above was from that era in the early 1970s when we first got to know about her over here in the UK. Her song Jolene did really well on our Singles Chart reaching the No. 7 spot in 1973. Back then, country music and big hair seemed to go hand in hand, and as the genre grew in popularity, we were treated to many other highly coiffed ladies of the country persuasion peppering our charts. Sadly, for mere mortals like us, the big, blousy, blonde wig is a non-starter – There would be ‘looks’ in the supermarket, it would blow off when out on a hill walk and I imagine your cranium would get very hot indeed.

The Judds, Tammy Wynette and Reba McEntire (not how we spell it around here!)

I don’t have much country in my digital library, but here is a song recorded by Dolly and two of her pals in 1993, Silver Threads and Golden Needles. Big hair had kind of had it’s day by the early nineties but it seems Dolly, Tammy and Loretta didn’t get that memo. The song, written by Dick Reynolds and Jack Rhodes, was first recorded by Wanda Jackson in 1956. It has since been recorded by just about everyone, but one of the better known versions came from Linda Ronstadt who included it on her debut album (back when the Eagles were her backing band).

Silver Threads and Golden Needles by Dolly Parton, Tammy Wynette and Loretta Lynn:

Not being an expert in country music, I didn’t quite get the significance of all the visitors the Honky Tonk Angels had to their dressing room in this clip, but some of the names certainly were familiar. I hope this list is accurate and complete (please put me right if it’s not), but it seems the following stars of country were all more than happy to put in a cameo appearance on the day of filming. Just shows the power and influence those three queens of country had. They are: Chet Atkins, Carl Perkins, Little Jimmy Dickens, Confederate Railroad, Ricky Skaggs, Tom Wopat, Bill Anderson, Grandpa Jones, Ronnie Milsap, Marty Stuart, Doug Stone, Rodney Crowell, Diamond Rio, Sammy Kershaw, Bill Monroe, George Lindsey, Charlie Chase, and Ralph Emery.

I did say that Dolly had come into my life twice this week but I now realise this will have to be a two-parter (a two-Parton) as I’ve already reached my wordcount. Having read a fair bit about her over the last few days I have an even greater admiration for her than I already had. She’s not for everyone, but I love how she always pokes fun at her looks, and doesn’t take herself too seriously. As a musician she has won just about every award going but she is also an incredibly successful businesswoman and humanitarian. The day she came into the world certainly was a good one for the employment prospects of those living in Pigeon Forge, Tennessee.

Before I go, here is a little montage of some of the other big-haired musicians I found when bemoaning the current state of my own locks. Who have I missed? Feel free to visit the comments boxes with your own favourite lions and lionesses of music.

Until next time…

Silver Threads And Golden Needles Lyrics
(Song by Dick Reynolds/Jack Rhodes)

I don’t want your lonely mansion with a tear in every room
All I want’s the love you promised beneath the haloed moon
But you think I should be happy with your money and your name
And hide myself in sorrow while you play your cheating game

Silver threads and golden needles cannot mend this heart of mine
And I dare not drown my sorrows in the warm glow of your wine
You can’t buy my love with money cause I never was that kind
Silver threads and golden needles cannot mend this heart of mine

Silver threads and golden needles cannot mend this heart of mine

Cher and Dolly Get a Pass, and It’s Not One For the Bus!

I’ve been meaning to write this one for a while, so here goes.

At what age do we start to feel old nowadays? For me it happened last year, and nothing to do with my chronological age or any physical changes that have come over me, it’s just that a new epidemic, in a very stealthy fashion, has taken the country by storm.

Never a week passes by without some female actor, presenter or well-known musician suddenly appearing on our screens looking ten years younger. I sometimes have to do a double take, as I find it hard to delve behind the frozen expression to find the lady within, one whom I often used to warm to greatly because of their enthusiastic and energetic performance. Now the acting seems wooden, as facial expressions are restricted to the mouth and chin – Nothing else moves a muscle, literally, for they are frozen into place with all manner of toxic bacteria.

How have we got to this point in our evolution? There seems to be no turning the tide either, as even those whom I thought would never partake, seem to be coerced into such madness for fear of their careers being over without it. We all know which “celebrities” are roughly the same age as ourselves (that would be 58 in my case) – Jeremy Clarkson is allowed to get grey and crinkly, whilst Carol Vorderman now looks about 20 years younger, and sports that polyurethane type of skin best suited to a child’s baby doll.

“They look really great for their age”, is a remark I often hear bandied about – Well yes, of course they do, as they’ve spent thousands of pounds nipping, tucking and freezing everything into place! I can’t help thinking some of these poor souls are going to suffer greatly in the years to come, as those syringes full of chemicals and fat, start to take their toll. There can be difficulty speaking, and a breakdown of the skin. Whoever decided a fat top lip was a good look anyway? It is the natural order of things that our bottom lip should be the predominant one, no doubt having evolved that way to best support feeding ourselves, talking and breathing.

thI3DN6OZO Nothing to be done but just accept that as a gender, females in the public eye are no longer allowed to grow old, which makes the rest of us who are not in the public eye, and have no intention of transforming ourselves, feel a bit shit. Just as well I’m a blogger and not a vlogger, as my 58-year-old appearance would no doubt have you faithful readers running for the hills.

But of course there are a few exceptions to my ire, and they are ladies who have made no secret of changing their appearance over the years, and who exist in the firmament of stars because they are indeed masters of human transformation – One of these is Cher and the other Dolly Parton. I can’t believe neither of these ladies have put in an appearance around here before, as I am a big fan of both.

Cher is now aged 72 and had a cameo role in the second of the Mama Mia! franchise of jukebox musicals last summer. We went to see it when on holiday, and the most hilarious scene in the entire film was when flawless “grandmother” Cher looked across the courtyard, only to catch the eye of her beau of many years previously, Fernando. This was a convoluted turn to the plotline indeed, but an excuse of course to include the song of the same name. Whilst promoting Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again, Cher confirmed she was working on an album that would feature cover versions of songs by the band Abba, and Dancing Queen, was released in the September of 2018. It topped the Billboard Album Sales chart (the crowd-pleasing one), making it Cher’s first ever number-one album.

Another septuagenarian who popped up on our screens recently is Dolly Parton. She was across in the UK promoting the new West End extravaganza, 9 to 5: The Musical. Here is a clip from a few years ago when she appeared in the Legends slot at Glastonbury. I don’t know what Dolly’s undergarments are like, or if it’s all cosmetically augmented, but she certainly has a perky bottom for someone of her years.

Jolene by Dolly Parton:

There is of course so much I could write about these two ladies, but for another day probably. In the meantime, as if proof were needed (no not really), here is a photo-montage of two remarkable artists who have both been around since the 1960s, but like Peter Pan, don’t seem to have aged one iota. Both freely admit to having had “absolutely everything done” when it comes to holding the years at bay, but as neither of them seem to ever take themselves too seriously, I don’t begrudge them the squillions of dollars that must have taken one bit.

As for the song Jolene, even to this day Mr WIAA winces when he hears it. It came out at just the wrong time for him, before he’d had work done to remedy his slightly discoloured teeth, which had come about because of the tablets his mum had taken for morning sickness ahead of his birth. Oh yes, kids can be cruel, and because his teeth had a “greenish” hue, his classmates’ playground taunt was Joe Green, Joe Green, Joe Green, Joe Green…. , sung along to the melody of Dolly’s famous 1976 hit. Needless to say, his schooldays weren’t “the best years of his life” but it just goes to show, sometimes a bit of “work” is needed to make life as a teen just that little bit more tolerable.

Until next time….